Writing is something

Writing is something –
that after my last downward spiral which seems so long ago hasn’t come or doesn’t seem to be needed, I’ve put my walls up a bit as I struggle with the current climate of this virus and headspace in my mind is still important don’t get me wrong I just struggle with the insignificance to share what I’m going through and it takes more inner strength to do this, I don’t know why as I know I’ve got nothing to hide as I’ve been real from the get go.
I guess it’s that inner battle of poor me crap and I don’t want others to think that’s why I do this.
So life is good, I’m feeling very lucky for where we live and love my environment. Work/Life/Balance.
I’m listening to my body all the time and taking the time to rest when it tells me.
I’m trying not to go within myself so much and speak what is on my mind.
My Neurofeedback sessions have now been reduced to once a month which is a huge achievement, it is so worth the time and effort into not giving up on yourself and pushing through the hard times.
I still take my medication for anti depressants it’s part of me and I’m okay with this, if a little tablet can keep my seratonin levels balanced then so be it.
I’ve realised and this is powerful, my depression is part of me and it’s moulded me to the person I am today. I’m not ashamed of this I know things happen for a reason and if I hadn’t gone through this I wouldn’t see what is in front of my very eyes.
So I’ve been on my run with my Rosie and am zoning into my Music while the words escape my mind, it does feel good to get them out I can feel my shoulders release from the current tension that is currently held.
Truth, running is hard work for me and it doesn’t come natural – the endorphins I receive from this workout is so worth the effort to get out the door as it keeps me sane.
So I’ve rambled enough, just checking in – the beauty of a blog or posting there is no pressure, you can do this whenever your heart desires there is no-one dependent on you to get it exactly right.
Stay save beautiful ones and honestly just do your best with this current situation we can all share and communicate in our own ways don’t assume.
Until next time x

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